My Everest

I have a flippin' headache. I started a post and had almost finished it when I accidentally deleted it, and I just don't feel like retyping it. It was whiny anyway, so I decided to go a different route. I'm not sure what that route is going to be, but I'll just type and we'll find out.
Have you ever wanted to fly? I have. From the time I was a little girl. I remember jumping off my grandpa's deck and flapping my arms so hard in an attempt to fly off into the air. It never worked, but I kept trying.
In my dreams, though, I fly. When I was young, I flew often. I loved that feeling. There was nothing like it. For awhile, my flying dreams stopped, but they returned a few months ago, not as often as before, but still so magical.
It's kind of funny that one of my dreams is to fly, since I am terrified of heights. Mom and I watched a Dateline NBC last night about people who had summitted Mt. Everest. It was amazing to see what they invested in time, money and energy to make their dream come true. Some people even died in their attempt.
As I was watching that, I thought: I want to live. I mean, really live! I don't want my fears or the idea that it would just take too much effort to keep me from achieving my dreams. For several years now, I've wanted to write a book, but I just keep putting it off. I'm not sure why. I wrote the outline a few weeks ago, but that is as far as I got. I don't know if it is the fear of putting so much time into a project and then having it fail, or maybe it's the fear of revealing too much about me and others. (Yes. You may laugh now. I know I'm mostly an open book, especially on here, but there are still things you don't know, and when I think of what I want to include in the book, I'm not sure I can handle the world knowing how human I really am!). It is something I really want to do, that I feel I really should do, but I'm afraid. I need to face my fears, and climb my Everest.
I also have a sermon that has been burning in my heart for a year now. At the time, we were involved in a ministry where lay people were allowed to preach and I was excited because I felt like God had laid this message on my heart. Unfortunately, the opportunity for me to preach never came to fruition and the sermon is still burning a whole in my heart. I realized a couple weeks ago that I don't need a pulpit to preach. We now have this thing called YouTube (amazing, I know!!). I could videotape my sermon and post it there...but I haven't done it. I think it's easier to hold on to my dream of preaching without ever trying it because that way, I don't have to chance finding out that I might be a terrible speaker! Again, I need to face my fears and climb my Everest.
Well, that is all my thoughts for now. A game of checkers with my son is calling my name. Over and out!